Bees and Bees
by illsprawl
Summary: Obi wan realizes that it's time for The Talk.


Title: Bees and Bees

Author: Captain Underpants (read: Pantsu Bachou)

Summary: As Anakin grows and matures (sort of), Obi-Wan prepares himself for The Talk.

Warnings: Fluff, failed attempts at humor and mild stupidity. Also OOC for poor Mace. I had to use somebody!

Star Wars doesn't belong to me.I don't have any snarky/witty comments to put here. It simply isn't mine.

Enjoy!

* * *

"The…talk, Master Windu? I'm not sure I understand."

After filing a small mission report with the council, Obi-Wan had been surprised when Mace Windu had pulled him aside for a private conversation about his padawan. He knew that the council had taken more interest in him as he grew older, but he was not sure Anakin warranted such private attention just yet.

"Not just any talk, Master Kenobi. _The Talk_." The man straightened his robes and trapped the younger Jedi with a stern look. "We have all watched young Skywalker grow with some interest, and I believe it would benefit you both to have this discussion early on to avoid conflict and confusion later. He is a very emotional boy."

Obi-Wan Kenobi smiled earnestly at the older Jedi. "He is learning, Master Windu. I assure you, whatever..._talk_...you speak of has probably already been given somewhere along the way."

Mace shook his head and placed a guiding hand on the smaller man's shoulder. He turned to gaze around the empty temple corridor, making sure there were no stray padawans or younglings about. "It is that time, Kenobi. Can you remember yourself at young Skywalker's age? He will have questions, whether he approaches you with them or not."

Obi-Wan honestly had no clue what was going on, and had never heard Master Windu speak so much in such a shortperiod of time. Briefly he wondered why the older man was taking such an interest in his padawan. Perhaps because of the prophecy? Perhaps at the urging of the other council members? He stared goggle-eyed at the older man.

"Don't be so surprised, Master Kenobi. As a member of the council, it is part of my duty to advise younger Jedi on when to introduce certain ideas to their padawans. Surely you have no objections?"

"N-no, Master Windu. But what will I be introducing to Anakin?"

"Your padawan is reaching an age where temptation can become overwhelming to those who are unprepared. He needs to understand his role as a Jedi, but also his role...as a young man. He is leaving the prepubescent stage of his life behind."

Obi-Wan stared. He was at a complete loss as to why _Mace Windu_ was urging him to discuss _puberty_ with his apprentice. After a moment he realized his mouth was hanging open and quickly clamped it shut.

"Be mindful of your padawan's age, Master Kenobi." Mace intoned sagely. "It was around this time that I had to discuss such matters with my _own_ padawan. It was not the most pleasant experience of my life." The dark man paused, his expression turning sour for a moment, as if even bringing the topic up brought him pain.

"...Just trust your feelings, and you'll do just fine." And Obi-Wan could only nod dumbly as the strict Jedi master turned on his heel and strode back into to the council chamber without another word.

...What in the name of the force...?

* * *

It was later that evening that Obi-Wan stepped into his home and quietly shut the door behind him. He gazed forward into the apartment and tugged at his robes as he pondered the task that lay before him. He was going to do it. He, Obi-Wan Kenobi...was going to give his padawan _The Talk_.

Now he just had to figure out exactly how to go about it. When had _he_ received _The Talk_? He vaguely remembered a pale Qui-Gon gripping him by the shoulders and uttering some nonsense about birds and bees and flowering plants, emphasizing each word with a little shake. He'd wanted _so much _for Obi-Wan to just _understand _so that he could be done with it, but Obi-Wan had been completely bewildered. It had been so out of character for his master to behave in such a way, and had he not been so confused, he probably would have enjoyed it. He marveled for a moment at how fast the years had gone by. He still missed his master's odd quirks and his brazen qualities. He'd been one of the bolder Jedi in the temple, and even _he_ had not been quite ready for _The Talk _with his apprentice.

He had never given much thought to it, but seeing as he was certainly the most prominent figure in Anakin's life, it was obvious that he should be the one to have the discussion with him. He reached out with the force and found Anakin in the room ahead, engrossed in his meditation. He had to quickly set up his mental shields, lest some of his discomfort be broadcast to his apprentice. He almost considered turning back and sprinting right out the door, or trying to dodge the boy and heading straight to his quarters. Perhaps Anakin had not yet sensed his return.

As if reading Obi-Wan's thoughts, the boy seemed to awaken from his reverie and called cheerily from the den. "Welcome back, Master."

Although he had not thought himself lucky enough to sneak past the boy and into his room, he could not help wincing a little at the greeting. If only Anakin knew what awaited him! Obi-Wan could not remember the last time he had felt such apprehension. Of course he knew what _The Talk _entailed, but really...did the Jedi even _need_ to know? They were instructed to live a life without love, attachment, and companionship...at least of _that _kind.

Still, he didn't want his padawan to be completely oblivious to the workings of his young body. The effects of that could be rather disastrous.

"Master?" Anakin's tone was questioning now, curious as to why he had not received a reply. After a moment Obi-Wan bit his lip to stifle a long-suffering sigh and padded softly into the small den area.

He realized belatedly that Master Windu had urged him on, but had not given him any real advice on how to approach the situation. _Trust your feelings_, he had said. And his feelings on the situation were...mixed, at best. Forcing himself back to the present, he greeted Anakin with a nod before tugging off his brown robe and carefully folding it and laying it across the back of the couch. He knew that stalling would not remedy the situation, but he simply could not help it. Anakin watched him with a bland sort of interest, and Obi-Wan knew it was time to get down to business.

He found a nice spot on the couch, sat down quickly, yelped, and pulled a small TIE-fighter model from beneath him. He stood and gave Anakin a warning glance before setting the toy on the table. He eyed the couch cushion and sat down gingerly, running a hand through his hair to stifle his nerves. He would scold Anakin about his toys and trinkets later. There were more pressing matters to attend to...although his rear did hurt a little now. He cleared his throat and smiled somewhat stiffly at the boy.

"Anakin, come sit with me," he murmured as kindly as he could, patting the spot next to him on the couch. Anakin grinned and eagerly obeyed.

He gazed evenly at his apprentice for a few moments, steeling himself for the task ahead before speaking. "After some careful consideration, my padawan, I...realized that it was about time to discuss some things with you. You are old enough now and I feel that this information will benefit you, so I ask for your patience while I try and explain."

Anakin's smile faded considerably during this little schpiel, and he began twirling his braid in a sullen manner. Perhaps he had thought that Obi-Wan wanted to share the events of his day at the counsel with him, or that they could watch a holovid together. Obi-Wan found the change in the boy's usually sunny demeanor quite humorous. "Honestly Anakin, give me a chance! I am not going to lecture you this evening." He reached out to ruffle the boy's already tousled hair. "I only wish to provide you with answers to some questions you may have been afraid to ask."

His padawan accepted the affectionate gesture, but still looked somewhat skeptical. Obi-Wan took a deep breath to prepare himself before beginning with what he hoped would be an adequate explanation on relationships between members of the opposite sex. He thought back to the large and somewhat nonsensical metaphor Qui-Gon had used, and wondered if he could make it work. He placed his hand an Anakin's shoulder. "This may seem sudden, and it may also seem strange, but just…bare with me, alright?"

Anakin nodded.

"Well…there are—ah, birds and bees, Anakin. I'm talking about people, but I'm using birds and bees to give you a good idea. Now, birds and, ahmm...well, birds and birds _can_ get on well with each other, as with the bees, but...they usually just stick together. They _go_ together. The birds and the bees." He peered into Anakin's face, somewhat disappointed by the child's blank expression. "Do you understand?"

The blonde boy quirked an eyebrow and shook his head plaintively. He had never seen birds and bees together. Not ever. Actually, he had never even seen bees at all, and he was a little iffy on birds.

Obi-Wan reached up to massage his temples, struggling to piece together something good and failing to hide his embarrassment from the boy. After a moment he spoke again. "You see, Anakin...when two people become _attached_ to one another, they often choose to spend their lives _together_. When they become very close and trust one another enough...they can become, ah..._intimate_." He stopped and gazed at Anakin, giving time to allow the information sink in. His padawan had other ideas, however, and quickly spoke up.

"Like us, Master?"

Obi-Wan flushed and tugged at his beard.

"No, Anakin. What I'm speaking of is quite different."

More twirling of that blasted braid. "But are we not close?"

"Anakin, when two people..._love_ each other in a _certain way_, they sometimes wish to show it." He had been trying to avoid using the "L" word, but he just hadn't seen a way around it. Of course Anakin quickly picked up on this delightful tidbit.

"How can you love in a _certain _way?" Anakin questioned with nonchalance, although Obi-Wan sensed a slight change in his expression and his mood. Although he was not completely certain about the change, he decided to try and appease the boy.

"The love I am talking about...it is not the same as the bond we share. It is on an entirely different level, padawan." He squeezed the boy's shoulder. "I do care for you deeply, but it is _very_ different." Emphasis on 'very.'

Anakin seemed to except this answer, and he stopped twisting his braid. After a moment he turned to gaze up at his master, and his bright eyes took on a mischievous glint. "And how do they _show_ it?" He asked slyly, and Obi-Wan was somewhat taken aback by his tone. "The details are mostly irrelevant, Anakin." He stated firmly. "However, that _is_ how children are born." He wasn't sure he really wanted to get into a discussion about childbirth with _Anakin_, of all people. It was still a rather touchy subject.

Anakin continued to stare up at him, as though he was actually expecting a more elaborate response. It was then that Obi-Wan began to pick up on the boy's giddy emotions, and he frowned. Just what was his padawan so amused about? He hadn't found the conversation at all funny, and the fact that Anakin knew _just_ what to ask to make him twitch only made him more suspicious.

"Is there something you'd like to ask, Anakin? Or better yet, something you'd like to tell me?"

His padawan began fiddling with his braid again, but his amusement did not fade.

"Master, to be honest...I already kinda know about all this stuff. Info travels fast around the temple. You didn't have to tell me all this stuff."

Although he had just admitted to allowing his master to ramble on pointlessly, Anakin did not appear embarrassed in the least. In fact, he was practically beaming up at the older man. "Besides, I'm already like thirteen and a half! It'd be pretty ridiculous if I _didn't_ know by now, don't you think?" He paused before adding, "Master," as more of an afterthought then an expression of respect.

There was an awkward pause, as Obi-Wan gazed impassively at the child before him.

"And where did you acquire such knowledge at the tender age of thirteen and a half?" Obi-Wan questioned lightly, both amused and chagrined. Anakin smiled cheekily. Or perhaps it was more of a..._smirk_. It was an expression Obi-Wan was becoming increasingly familiar with as Anakin grew older. He wasn't exactly sure when the 'smirk' had made its first appearance, but it brought him great unease--and with good reason too, after he had encountered the mayhem and destruction that usually followed that expression like clockwork.

"The other padawans know all about it. Even some of the younglings understand the...uh... general mechanics. I thought it was pretty obvious."

This comment dragged Obi-Wan's brows up a notch further. He opened his mouth to protest this particular idea, but was interrupted yet again.

"If you are finished with _The Talk_, master, I think I'd like to go to my room." Anakin twirled his braid around his index finger a couple of times before standing from his position beside his master.

Obi-Wan sighed in slight irritation. "I'm not sure if I'm entirely satisfied with our conversation."

The boy shook his tousled blonde head and grinned wryly. "I'm sorry I did not stop you sooner, Master. I was just curious about what you had to say."

After studying that guileless expression, Obi-Wan decided that he did not have the energy to argue, so he simply waved his hand in dismissal.

"Bed, Anakin. You have early classes to attend tomorrow."

"Of course, Master."

He was surprised when his padawan leaned back down to give him a quick, chaste hug. He did not even have the time to protest before Anakin had snatched up the TIE-fighter from the table and disappeared down the tiny hallway to his room. He blinked, slightly shocked at the sudden affection from his padawan. He knew that Anakin longed for companionship, but he had never showed this need in such a way. After a moment he allowed himself to sink down in the couch, relaxing for the first time all day.

He sat gazing out the large windows for a while, admiring the many bright, silvery buildings and the night sky of Coruscant that was still busy with the heavy flow of traffic. Just as he was about to retreat to his own bed, he felt Anakin softly reach out through their bond. Certainly the boy was getting lazy if he couldn't just make the quick trip back down the hallway to speak with him. Deciding he would allow it just once, he opened up his mind.

_'Master_,' the soft touch began, curious and playful. _'You said that...birds and birds could get along well together.'_

There was a pause in the phrase, and Obi-Wan wondered just where Anakin was going with this. He could feel the boy's amusement through their bond as if it were his own. Which it certainly wasn't.

_'How about bees and bees?'_

Obi-Wan immediately rolled his eyes. _'Goodnight, Anakin.'_

He reached back to grab his robe where he had placed it and headed to his bedroom, nearly tripping over a model starfighter on his way. He sent a dark look at the innocent little ship, hoping that Anakin could feel his irritation from the other side of the apartment.

Oh, yes. They'd talk about all these toys tomorrow. After all, Anakin did not need mundane attachments. They would not benefit him in any way.

He opened the door to his room and began preparing himself for a good night's rest. And, left alone with his thoughts, Obi-Wan could not help wondering just who had given _The Talk _to who.

* * *

Well, I'm not really sure where I was going with this one. I guess I just like the fics that are sort of...you know, "Before Vader." I really like to imagine Obi-Wan and Anakin just kind of chilling around the apartment, or horsin' around on missions. I'm tempted to turn this into a chapter story that chronicles all of the things they do together, but I doubt it would hold anyone's interest. Anyway, to be honest, I wanted this story to be really funny, but...it just isn't. I didn't really know how to work in the humor. I think it came out okay though, if a little boring. This is my first fic EVER in the Star Wars fandom, so go easy on me. Sorry about any grammar mistakes! And no, this isn't slash. Anakin is way too young! xD Don't be so perverted.

Anyway, I hope you liked it! Please read and review:D


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